Guess what movie I saw this weekend !
The movie left at least 25 shades of disappointment and the other 25
of confusion. I won't say that I hated it, but I will say I had some
issues. First I have to address the "abuse/rape culture" aspect. Many activists complained of the glorification of abuse and rape culture in the book. I
didn't see any scenes that promoted abuse or rape in the movie. (Well
there was the scene where he tied her to the bed post, turned her over
and roughly penetrated her from behind. But even with that, she gave consent
??? Question marks because that scene did have some borderline abuse
overtones to it. ) I have not read the book so I don't know what took
place in the book. I hear Christian ignored Anastasia's use of the
safeword. (Not Good !) That didn't take place in the movie. And I'm glad it didn't or I probably would have walked out.
The movie in
my opinion was so vanilla that I was just about bored to tears.
I consider my occasional practices in BDSM to be very vanilla, yet I can't help but thinking just how slow this movie was.
I hated how he kept saying that he was going to do this and he wanted
to do that to her. When I'm in the heat of the moment I don't say, "I'm
going to F**k you hard" or "I'm going to punish you." That was just too
corny for me. BDSM is about exploration, pushing buttons and seeing
what drives my boy crazy; Not giving blow by blow commentary.
The fact that the camera focused so much on Anestasia's nudity and
rarely touch on Christian's nudity showed great sexism in my opinion.
Not that I wanted to see him nude, (being a gay man)(he didn't do
anything for me.) but the imbalance was quite noticeable.
were too pretty and too White. Being a man of color, I know we are out
there. Yes, we may be few but even so, when I'm out in the BDSM community I
see very few people that looked liked them. Yeah I know they have to
make it sexy but another problem is that society only focuses on one
group as candidates for being sexy which is not true.
There were more issues, but I don't want to totally bash the movie. I do think that the fact that this concept was written by a woman helps society see that women are sexual beings just like men and have certain fantasies. I Don't even have an issue that many women want their man to take totally control in the bedroom. Their is nothing wrong with being submissive. But being an object for a man to use however or whenever is problematic. And this applies for all types of couples, whether it is a heterosexual, gay or lesbian relationship.
So there you have my take.
May your shades be more sexy and pleasurable than Grey's